The Buddy System

In college I was a member of student government, which often translated into people knowing my name without my knowing theirs. During those years, I learned to rely on something I called the “Buddy System.” It sounds glamorous, but all it really comes down to employing the use of the term “Buddy” whenever I would blank on the name of a person who was saying hello. In the world of college relationships where being casual is a value that is held in high esteem, it often seemed to carry me through many a social situation.

If it was not obvious before, hospital rooms are dramatically different environments; I am getting a sneaking suspicion that the “Buddy System” will not serve me as well here at the hospital as it has in years past. On more than one occasion, I have found myself utterly forgetting the person’s name when praying for/with the patient. Somehow praying for “Buddy’s” recovery and for God’s presence in “Buddy’s” life seems less… personal. I guess some theology could be developed that the use of such terminology that causes patients to view God as a friend who would not leave them hanging—after all, Kevin Smith introduced the idea of “Buddy Christ” in the 1999 movie Dogma—but something inside tells me that it is not the best pastoral practice.

By the second day, however, I began to notice a pattern. It is not as though I am employing a “checklist” mentality when walking into each room, but in that time in the hallway, it is sometimes difficult for me not to look at my census as a “To Do” sheet. And it was only the times when I set aside my “tasks” and prayed over the names of the patients I would be encountering that I remembered their names when it came time to pray. In other words, it was usually the times when I checked in with my “good buddy God” that I was able to go beyond generic nicknames.